It's ten. I'm tired. I should just be sleeping. Instead I think it would be a great time to do a little web surfing. Go to pinterest be inspired or depressed. Go read about what other amazing Mom's are doing in the blogging world refinishing furniture and doing crafts with their smartly dressed children and then posting pictures of their fresh from the garden dinner they ate. I settle on a mindless show on netflix, only to realize I can do none of this stuff because my internet service is just not good enough to be doing any of these things.
I have my dear little three year old sleeping at the foot of my bed in his pack n play while the kid's room is getting remodeled . He is carrying on conversations with whatever is in his bed with him. Tonight it is a puppy and a monkey and a paper towel that he is planning on turning into a model airplane in the morning. I wonder why I am looking for entertainment on my computer. I have my very own little bit of it right in my room. The things he says and the expressions he uses never fail to amaze me. Every now and then the conversation will cease while he breaks out in song. Some recognizable some totally and completely made up. I love this little guy. These amazing little boys that God has given us. At times they make me want to scream, they exasperate beyond belief. They fill my life with so much joy and love. I am undeserving of these blessings. I just need to remind myself from time to time that it's ok if our life is a little crazy. A little messy. Sometimes completely out of control. We forget to water the garden, we might eat toast and peanut butter for supper. The only craft of the summer might be me sending them outside with duct tape and gorilla glue. Some days I might let them watch movies and eat junk food all they want just so I can finish my book.
I hope to be inspired by other Mom's who do a wonderful job being a Mom, but most of all I want to remember the most important task I have is raising up men of God. Guys that are not afraid to stand up for truth. Who will always speak the truth. Who love and put Christ first in their lives, and live lives of integrity. I'm actually not sure how to do that. I just need to give them to God and hope he can work through my mistakes. Thanking God tonight for the wonderful Grace of Jesus. Allowing me the privilege of raising these little boys and working in their hearts because I cannot do it on my own.
